Being a mom to five kids navigating through five VERY different childhood milestones can be both difficult and a true learning experience...
Over the years, I have strategically learned how to balance motherhood, marriage and being an entrepreneur. It isn’t easy balancing different titles but anything worth having won’t come easy. As we all know… motherhood has its moments but I want to share with you each phase I’m currently in and how communication can break the barriers between parents and children.
I have an amazing 14 year old son who has a slight speech delay. With this disability comes countless specialist appointments, along with the regularly scheduled dentist and doctor appointments. Feeling misunderstood is one of his main complaints in regards to his exceptionality. My son is the sweetest kid but being that he is also very much a TEENAGER, he is in that phase of “not talking to his dad and I” be it about school or really anything for that matter. He just loves his video games.
My pre-teen is 11 years old. He is smart, talented, and smart mouthed. Sometimes I do not have the energy to handle his spark-like personality. He’s in the phase of YouTube and has his own YouTube channel. He loves to show me all of his favorite videos. He even has his brothers calling him by his screen name “Proherbie Cool”.
Big Boy, Toddler & Baby
Then there are the babies, which include my seven, four and one year old. I’ve grouped them together because that’s how the attacks come, together! I literally feel like I catch it from all sides. My seven year old doesn’t have an off switch, my four year old is always hungry and fights sleep. My one year old, who still likes to nurse occasionally enjoys throwing things on the floor after I’ve picked them up all while being nude.
Despite the obvious chaos of life, I’ve learned that all kids want is attention. They want us to take a break from our busy lives and focus on them. Life is all about balance and I’ve actually started creating some simple, affordable ways to create memories to add balance to our lives.
Here are my 5 ways to create balance:
- Mom & Son Dates- I let the boys pick their favorite fast food or ice cream restaurant. I take them alone, we go sit, I put the phone down, and I listen to everything they want to say.
- Park Days- this is specifically for the little ones however, dad comes along with us and we split the children. He takes the older two to play basketball and I take the younger three to the playground to burn off some energy.
- Movie Night- we go to the local Dollar Tree to stock up on popcorn, and their favorite candy, and we grab our blankets, turn on the fire stick and watch their favorite movies.
- After School Time- I ask my kids about their day. And I mean intuitively ask abot their day. Sometimes the “how was your day” question begins and ends with “good” but I like to dig deeper. This gives us 5-10 minutes in between pickups to hear all about it. My oldest two children have actually opened up more because of this method.
- Truth Corner- this is where I set aside time, almost like an appointment, where they come and talk to me with no repercussions. I have found this very useful. It’s to the point now they just come to me and say Truth Corner and I immediately know that it’s time for me to listen.
Yes, while it all seems impossible to do, as parents we want to financially provide but in the midst of chaos, we HAVE to learn to slow down and hear our children. By being there for them it makes them feel loved. Communication is so important in families and should be exercised daily.
Thoughtfully Written by Lasheika Simmons,